I am a product of the Church. I was reared in the home of a Church of God pastor and wife, Rev. Daniel H. and Alice Neace. I honor and revere their memory. Yet, I am also a product of the era of the late 1960’s and 1970’s. During my “formative years,” - from age 12 to 18 - I was highly influenced by the music of Johnny Cash and Bob Dylan, three of my high school teachers, and a desperate search for meaning.

For most of those years, I was an imposter. I stood around the edges of everything, and never really committed to anything. I was as comfortable in a high school Bible study setting as I was with friends who were getting drunk and high. While I never used illegal drugs, many of my acquaintances assumed I did because I “posed” as one in their company. For a short while, my drug of choice was alcohol and tobacco. I posed as a leader in the high school Bible Study Group while infatuated with the “hippies” I encountered at college spiritual retreats.

All of my posing was due to the fact that I had nothing deep seeded in my heart. I was searching for anything that would fill the void in my soul. I would have agreed with anything to find true meaning and happiness. I questioned the existence of God. I searched in vain for anything that would make me accepted, loved, and whole.

Family and friends who knew me then might be surprised at some of the admissions in this writing. Most of my turmoil was internal and, as an imposter I developed a keen ability to hide my true feelings and the desperate nature of my soul. My searching came to climax on night in August 1975 at the intersection of Illinois Highway 127 and 146 in Southern Illinois.

Following graduation from high school, I had been living and working with my brother in southeast Missouri. One Friday night I left Cape Girardeau, MO, and was going back to my home town of Murphysboro for the weekend. I was to see my parents, but a party at Lake Murphysboro was more on my mind. I finished my first malt liquor before I crossed the Illinois line, a beer chaser followed.

That combination and a lack of food and sleep caused me to lose focus easily. Near the intersection of Route 146 and 127, I came as close as I possibly could to having a head-on collision. As I swerved and finally regained control of the car and pulled to a stop, I stumbled out of the car and sat down in the middle of the road, under a flashing caution light that signaled the intersection.

The magnitude of my sin became real to me as I realized that if I had died in that state, I would have gone to eternity unprepared to stand in the presence of the God who had suddenly became real to me. I knelt under that flashing caution light and prayed for God’s grace and mercy. I told him I would quit playing spiritual games and commit my life to being real – no longer an impostor. That night, in an instant he saved my soul. At the same time he sobered my mind and allowed me to travel home clean and sober.

Since that time, my spiritual journey has continued. Honestly, I still struggle with issues of my past. I am haunted by my doubts. I am more blessed and happier now than I have ever been in my life… and still I am reminded; still I am driven to the cross; still I am called to a deeper walk; still, I am on a journey.

So, I would invite you to travel with me in the pages of this site. It is my prayer that my journey – struggles and all – may be a mirror that you might discover truth about yourself. That you will be reminded of the beauty of God’s creation; and ultimately see the God whom I have found to be faithful.